Looking on a potential move to Raleigh area from NOVA. All advice welcome including other locations.

Background: two kids (7, 9); my job is full remote now; wife and I from NOVA; my brother now in Raleigh area and parents in NC as well; her parents still in NOVA

Reasons for move: better house; improved social and school opportunities for kids; both of us have always wanted to go south

What Raleigh area?: good area for young families; lots to do within and around Raleigh; family proximity; not too far from VA connections; closer to southern beaches

Research thus far: obviously know a fair amount from my brother and we did a serious trip there a year ago. I was ready to pull trigger with 12 Oaks community in Holly Springs but wife wasn't ready. Will go back again and look harder at Apex, Holly Springs, Wake Forest. Perhaps Cary but think the house won't be enough of an upgrade. Wife keeps bringing up need for downtown / central area of focus & community (e.g., restaurants, bars, outdoor concerts). She is also into long-distance biking and accustomed to W&OD Trail.