1. How hard is it?
2. Seriously, how the f hard is it????

My food delivery was made at 4:47. Is it here? Hell no.
I'm pretty sure it got delivered somewhere on my street, but this UPS guy is simply incapable of matching the address number on the box with the one on a house here. Go up and down the street, and the numbers are plainly visible on everyone's house and mailbox. Apparently, this driver uses the 'close enough' strategy made famous in "Funny Farm".

I normally risk impersonating a porch pirate and wander around looking for it, but no. No, no, no. He is going to have to carry his azz back here, find the package, learn to read numbers, and deliver the dam thing right this day.