You seem to think cynically about everything by default. Everyone cheats. There is no human decency. And so on and so forth. Aside from the fact that none of those things are true, is there no room for light and love in that mind of yours? You need to get back out there and learn to trust again my friend. I know there's some love and optimism somewhere deep inside. Dig deep and see if you can find it. I have faith.